Something's Amiss!

Solid guides can help as you puzzle through midlife.

Aug 18, 2024

Our dear friends from North Carolina came for a cabin visit this past week. On the sunny days, we enjoyed fishing, boating, a fish dinner on the deck, and a sunset paddle in the kayaks.

On the cool, cloudy, and windy day, we opted for a little sightseeing at the nearby Mississippi headwaters (Itasca State Park) and Bemidji. We enjoyed lunch on the shores of Lake Bemidji at Ruttger’s Birchmont Lodge, took photos with Paul Bunyan and Babe, browsed the Watermark Art Center and downtown gift shops, and ended our day with happy hour at Bar 209 (gotta’ love half-price apps and drinks!).

Walking across the Mississippi headwaters.

Back at the cabin, with the whole evening still ahead of us, we opened up a jigsaw puzzle. On a recent visit to Bemidji’s Goodwill store, I had found an amazing deal—two “Something’s Amiss Puzzle Twist” puzzles for $2 each (normally around $25)! Since one of our visiting friends is an avid, skilled angler, we opted to all work together on “Fishing Frenzy.”

It was a used puzzle, so we wondered if there might be missing pieces. And since it was a “Something’s Amiss” puzzle, we knew the picture on the box might not match up exactly with the puzzle. I expected a surprise or two as we began assembling. We soon realized, however, that not just something was amiss. Everything was amiss! Nearly every fish was in a different position than shown on the box. This “guide” was of little use to us.

The four of us struggled through—confused, disoriented, and on the verge of throwing the pieces back in the box and returning it to Goodwill. That is, until we Googled the Puzzle Twist “Reveal” and found an image online of how the actual completed puzzle should look. It was still tricky with all the similar fish scales, fins, and eyes, but having an accurate guide made all the difference in the world in our willingness to persevere.

Isn’t that the way it is in life too? Parenting, empty nesting, aging, making retirement decisions—these various pieces in our puzzles can be mind-boggling. Situations present themselves that we’ve had no experience with. We get wrapped up in whatever piece we’re struggling with and often can’t see the big picture. To make matters worse, we’re often given false information, poor advice, or just plain confusing instructions. Even the Bible—my ultimate guide for life—has many confounding passages.

I’m sorry to say I don’t have a big “reveal” to help you untwist the midlife puzzles you might be encountering. But here are a few solid resources (websites, podcasts, Substack bloggers, and books) that have guided me in this transitional life stage.

Website:

Next Avenue

Podcasts:

Substack bloggers:

Books

You’ll find several book recommendations on the “shelves” in my Bookshop.org “Shop”.

Books on Spiritual Practices and Soul Care
Books on Empty Nesting
Books on Becoming a Better Person (Self-Help)
Get advice and encouragement from 22 empty-nesters (including me!) in This Reimagined Empty Nest. Available at several online bookstores. (Signed copies are available through my website, with 10% off for subscribers!)

*Contains affiliate links. If you purchase through these links, I get a tiny commission at no extra cost to you. Bookshop.org is an online retailer that supports local, independent bookstores.

You may be wondering about that puzzle…

When we rose the next morning to more rain, all four of us leaned over the coffee table, attacking the puzzle like a Northern Pike bites a hook (i.e. with a vengeance). Still, we wouldn’t net this 1000-piece puzzle before bidding farewell to our friends.

After hugs all around and “safe travels!” they were on their way, and Tom and I resumed our places at the table. We spent most of the day, minus meals and stretch breaks, hunched over that puzzle. By the time we went to bed that night, our backs were aching. Who knew jigsaw puzzles could be so taxing on one’s body?

By the next morning, the end was in sight. Would all the pieces be there? Or would we find disappointing holes in our masterpiece? We picked the last piece off the table and put it in place. Two holes remained. After all our “work”, the imperfect finished product was a bit of a letdown. But there was a bit more searching to do.

I scanned our colorful rug under the coffee table and found one missing piece. Then the other!

Yes! Like landing a great catch, we admired our good work, skill, and perseverance. With time, effort, the help of friends, and the right guide, every piece fell into place and thankfully, there was nothing amiss.